Okay, girls, look.... If MY marriage can be saved, ANY marriage can be saved.

Trust me, I’m not here to judge or condemn you. Sometimes (yeah a lot of the time), marriage is HARD. Like your face being pushed into a fire with a lawnmower running and the blades about to hit your nose HARD.

My marriage has been HARD for 28 years. It still is HARD.

For many years, the word “perfect” would have never come up. I mean... the years when we served as life group leaders, people may have described us that way. But they only saw the highlight reel.

They didn’t see the passive aggressiveness, the mental illness, the lack-of-sleep parenting, the lustful wishes, the cutting words spat between us, the aching for something more, the mistakes... the sin.

Somewhere along the line, after loving each other through both of our stupidity, we realized and put up a FRAME in our home that said “A PERFECT marriage is just TWO IMPERFECT PEOPLE who REFUSE to give up on each other.” One sentence that speaks a million imperfect words.... Broken down into a million imperfect letters.

Can you relate? Follow here…. MUCH more to come…

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I always thought of the phrase “God goes before me” to mean that He will clear a path, He will protect me, and that He’s already “before” me to be a soft landing when things get hard.

This carefully placed circle on the floor stopped me in my tracks today… and it changed me.

God said, “I want you to have Me first and foremost before you go forward… in whatever you say or do.”

In this moment at She Speaks 2026, a conference I’ve attended eight times now… I learned a new meaning for these words. It can’t be MY plan first for me to ask God to bless and protect… it has to be HIS plan first.

So after all these years of not understanding why it wasn’t “my time” for the book to be published, maybe it’s because I’ve had this backward. Just maybe… all of my plans were not founded in the very heart of what He really wants me to do.

HE goes BEFORE me. I get it now.

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I am a wife, mother of 3, and an Athletic Director (currently on break)… who is passionate about Jesus, my family, baseball, sports & fitness, music, and coffee. You will read a lot about these things here at Home Team Mom. God is teaching me what it means to anchor down… to hold on to Him with all I’ve got and live for His glory alone.

We all struggle. We all have weaknesses. But God is greater.

My desire is that this will be a place of transparency in a world that makes us think we need to be perfect. We all have a story. Here is a little of mine…

After many years, I am letting go and resigning to the fact that God has given me a story to tell… and that story continues to grow and change. For many years, I tried to put my faith in people, subconsciously thinking that earthly relationships could hold me together. But as life brought twists and turns, I found myself at Christ’s feet, seeking to be completely anchored to Him, not to any earthly being… or thing… or place.

1 Timothy 1:16 says, “…I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display His unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on Him and receive eternal life.” This is me.

Now for the FUN stuff about me. I love spending time with my family and friends. With 3 teenagers (well, one “almost” teen), I stay pretty busy! When I’m not busy trying to survive the hurricane that is our home, I love to get down to my artistic & athletic roots. Writing, designing, doing anything creative, playing the guitar, singing, running, golfing, playing tennis, watching baseball and college basketball… all of these things bring out the best in me (and the competitive side of me). I would gladly do all of these things beside the ocean if I could.

Bucket list items? So glad you asked! My top one is to see a baseball game in EVERY stadium in America. I’m now at 10. You can see the beginnings of my ballpark travel wall in the picture! Another is to visit The Cavern in Liverpool, where the Beatles really got their start. Yep, I’m a fan.

Oh! And did I mention that I love coffee??

So now that my serious stuff and fun stuff is out there for you all to read… let me sum it up by saying this: My life is very blessed. Not perfect… not by a long shot. But very blessed. And it would not be what it is without Jesus. If you do not know Him, I so desire for you to find Him here on these pages.

I can pretty much tell the state of my life by the state of my house and car. When everything is in disarray and I can find nothing, I know that’s where my heart is, too. Unfortunately, that’s when my messy tends to come out on people that I care about. Words spoken in haste – unable to be retrieved. Oh how I wish I wasn’t messy!

Do you ever think your messy is worse than someone else’s? Ever think you’re alone in how messy you are? Or that your life is falling apart while that “other” person has it perfectly together? It’s a facade… just like the highlight reel of social media.

Let me just clear it up: NO ONE HAS IT ALL TOGETHER! WE ARE ALL MESSY!

• That photoshopped actress on the magazine you stare at – messy.

• The NBA player making millions – messy.

• The mom who homeschools 6 kids, has a perfect house, and seems to have a “perfect” marriage – messy.

• The girl who sings/writes/paints/leads so beautifully – messy.

• The one who is always smiling {when you see them} – messy.

• Any grass that seems greener – messy. Trust me.

A family in our community lost a son/brother/friend a while back. Although I haven’t seen him in several years, I will always remember him with a bright smile, running around encouraging and challenging others. I wonder if he secretly thought his inner messy was worse than everyone else’s. Gone way too soon. It breaks my heart.

When will we all come to realize that we are not perfect – not one of us is! We need God and we need each other – in a REAL way, not in a plastic way. How many will suffer depression, anxiety, and struggle alone… before we do something about this epidemic?

Here’s the deal – I’m messy. And guess what? You are too. BUT GOD knows us FULLY and loves us FULLY. He knows our unique messy and loves us just the same. Tauren Wells sings it straight to God better than I could ever say it…

I’m fully known and loved by You
You won’t let go no matter what I do
And it’s not one or the other
It’s hard truth and ridiculous grace 
To be known, fully known, and loved by You. ~ Known

I think it’s time we let go of our people-pleasing fears. Life is too short to not be who you and I really are – the exact people God created each one of us to be. Let’s embrace our messy… together.

My favorite line in Tauren Wells’ song is “it’s hard truth and ridiculous grace.” Hard truth and ridiculous grace is exactly what we need to cover our messy. God gives us this truth and grace; and we need true friends who can give us the same. Not permissiveness, but truth spoken in love. Not judgment, but grace. It’s a fine balance but it’s what God wants for our relationships. He wants us to do life TOGETHER and have REAL conversations – in the messy.

When was the last time you shared your struggles with someone in your life? If you can’t remember the last time, let me challenge you… Find someone you trust and don’t be afraid to share the messy.

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